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highlyeccentricTwo Bi Guys.
I've been dipping in and out of this podcast in non-linear order and I'm really enjoying it.
I think the first one I listened to was Three trans bi guys, which was just... really sweet and nice. That's all I've got on that one.
Since then I've enjoyed the first episode, and both enjoyed and been ... productively annoyed by the season 3 launch episode. Loved the two parter with Shiri Eisner, bisexual masculinity and bisexual judaism and resistance. Jacob Engelberg was guest host on those, and I followed back and LOVED the episode on Bad bisexuals where he was guest - Yes! These opinions on media, I agree with them!
The interview with Jen Winston, which I listened to tonight: HEARTEYES. Winston is a nonbinary woman, and the way they talk about bisexuality and nonbinary gender being tied up for them? I actually hadn't seen anyone approach it like that before. Eisner talks about their genderqueer status as a given. A lot of other people talk about the connection between nonbinary-ness and bi/pan sexuality in a way that sort of... fronts the gender, making the sexuality a given.
I've been trying to grapple my way to the flip side: that somehow my whole Gender Situation is emergent from my queerness, and specifically from bisexuality, and not really managing to articulate that. I've gravitated back towards pre-butler lesbian theory, like Monique Wittig, as outlined here by Theresa de Lauretis. The whole "lesbians are not women" thing, which I think de Lauretis is right, was misrepresented by Butler (but I haven't read Wittig in depth in the original French so I can't swear to that). And yet, I'm grappling with the fact that ... I still will not rule out dating men. I came so very very close to drawing that line in the sand, and then I met Shiny (trans man/genderqueer/etc), but also Metamour - who is frequently annoying in ways that I associate with straight men, but also in ways that I am annoying, and... yeah. Nah. Queer men can stay, even the annoying ones.
-- for that, for remaining "available to men", Wittig would not be at all interested in me.
But Jen Winston? It's not high theory. But they jokingly said they were "bi for bi" and like - oh. Yeah. That could be my operating framework (I'd been stick on how to articulate this! No one complains if a queer person doesn't want to date straight men, but my lack of interest in lesbians? Sounds prejudiced. I maintain I'm allowed to preference people closer to my experience, it's not like a vast swathe of lesbians don't do likewise when eliminating bi women from their dating pool; but look, a positively framed label!). And then they talked about how their experience with bisexuality and rethinking gender vis a vis attraction meant the paths were already forged for their gender reconsiderations - not CAUSAL, but assistive.
Honestly I'd be willing to try out a causal logic. But I'd not even see anyone try out the 'well this thing made that thing easier' logic *in that direction*, before. I'M FEELING PRETTY VALIDATED.
Also my life goal is now to do something cool enough to be on Two Bi Guys.
I've been dipping in and out of this podcast in non-linear order and I'm really enjoying it.
I think the first one I listened to was Three trans bi guys, which was just... really sweet and nice. That's all I've got on that one.
Since then I've enjoyed the first episode, and both enjoyed and been ... productively annoyed by the season 3 launch episode. Loved the two parter with Shiri Eisner, bisexual masculinity and bisexual judaism and resistance. Jacob Engelberg was guest host on those, and I followed back and LOVED the episode on Bad bisexuals where he was guest - Yes! These opinions on media, I agree with them!
The interview with Jen Winston, which I listened to tonight: HEARTEYES. Winston is a nonbinary woman, and the way they talk about bisexuality and nonbinary gender being tied up for them? I actually hadn't seen anyone approach it like that before. Eisner talks about their genderqueer status as a given. A lot of other people talk about the connection between nonbinary-ness and bi/pan sexuality in a way that sort of... fronts the gender, making the sexuality a given.
I've been trying to grapple my way to the flip side: that somehow my whole Gender Situation is emergent from my queerness, and specifically from bisexuality, and not really managing to articulate that. I've gravitated back towards pre-butler lesbian theory, like Monique Wittig, as outlined here by Theresa de Lauretis. The whole "lesbians are not women" thing, which I think de Lauretis is right, was misrepresented by Butler (but I haven't read Wittig in depth in the original French so I can't swear to that). And yet, I'm grappling with the fact that ... I still will not rule out dating men. I came so very very close to drawing that line in the sand, and then I met Shiny (trans man/genderqueer/etc), but also Metamour - who is frequently annoying in ways that I associate with straight men, but also in ways that I am annoying, and... yeah. Nah. Queer men can stay, even the annoying ones.
-- for that, for remaining "available to men", Wittig would not be at all interested in me.
But Jen Winston? It's not high theory. But they jokingly said they were "bi for bi" and like - oh. Yeah. That could be my operating framework (I'd been stick on how to articulate this! No one complains if a queer person doesn't want to date straight men, but my lack of interest in lesbians? Sounds prejudiced. I maintain I'm allowed to preference people closer to my experience, it's not like a vast swathe of lesbians don't do likewise when eliminating bi women from their dating pool; but look, a positively framed label!). And then they talked about how their experience with bisexuality and rethinking gender vis a vis attraction meant the paths were already forged for their gender reconsiderations - not CAUSAL, but assistive.
Honestly I'd be willing to try out a causal logic. But I'd not even see anyone try out the 'well this thing made that thing easier' logic *in that direction*, before. I'M FEELING PRETTY VALIDATED.
Also my life goal is now to do something cool enough to be on Two Bi Guys.
no subject
Date: 2021-10-17 08:05 pm (UTC)I definitely think that acquiring most of my dating-people though BiCon has smoothed the gender slide.
no subject
Date: 2021-10-18 01:37 am (UTC)