yay, bonus points to me

one cervical cancer vaccination booked for monday.

Tales of Joel

My brother has the best swindle i've ever heard of going as far as his schoolfriends goes. His schoolmates are a protective lot, and don't like other guys hanging out with their girlfriends/ younger sisters. Except for Joel, of course, because they all think he's gay. So Joel's the only guy on the soccer team allowed to talk to Bob's sister Lucy; Joel's allowed to take various girls over to the shops after school for afternoon tea; Joel has it good. But it gets even better- the girls, apparently, aren't fooled by Joel's emo clothing and believe him when he says he's straight. Accordingly, they consider him a good arbiter of lingerie suitability. So my brother spends two afternoons a week sitting in changerooms while his friends' girlfriends try on lingerie- and they come out and show him. Sometimes he sits outside the toilets while they take pregnancy tests. Then he goes home to mum and has various critical things to say about their lack of common sense in their sex life and/or lingerie choices.

Other tales in this series, coming when i get the chance:

Winter Camp- why are all the hot girls thirteen?
Easter Camp- Altercations with Bec's Breast
Faint Heart Failed to Win Fair Lady

On getting rid of unwanted suitors

(only suitable if you know you're never going to see said suitor again, and his resulting opinion of you as a raving loonie means nothing to you. also not suitable for use on conservative Christians, lest they be inflamed by your obvious holiness)

*tilt head coyly and gaze up at him through your lashes. twist your hands together for greater effect*
My chastity buddy says I shouldn't be dating right now, because I'm not strong enough. She ought to know, she's been dating for months now, so she really knows what temptation is like. *sigh wistfully* she's so much stronger than I... *suddenly focus in on your suitor again* But thank you for asking, that's really nice of you!

(this routine developed with aid of Kate)