I do not love you, Dr Freud
Apr. 27th, 2011 02:09 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I Do Not Love You, Dr. Freud
Arlene Aang
Your complaint that you cannot grasp your homosexuality implies that you are not yet aware of your phantasy of making me a rich man.
-Sigmund Freud
For months I labored to eliminate this attraction
from my subconscious as one would squeeze lemon juice
down the length of a leech. So you had me tongue
the bodies of rich women until my mouth grew numb.
My womb, my inability to find pleasure in the sexual act
was your private eel experiment. You said,
in dying early, my father had stripped me of male genitals—
hence my being a woman. So when the Inheritrix of Stanford
left me the family jewels in exchange for services,
I thought it odd that you showed extreme
interest in possessing them. Perhaps there was a reason
you refused to talk about your own childhood
or gave injections that heightened
your patients’ awareness of rape. Please be advised
that when I broke your jaw against the safe,
it was only to spare you the pain of castration.
I couldn’t leave without retrieving part of the manhood
you swindled from me. I have found my peace
in the Antipodes and pray that you find
yours as you sip your supper through a straw.
You have used people badly long enough.
Published in blossombones, summer 2010
Arlene Aang
Your complaint that you cannot grasp your homosexuality implies that you are not yet aware of your phantasy of making me a rich man.
-Sigmund Freud
For months I labored to eliminate this attraction
from my subconscious as one would squeeze lemon juice
down the length of a leech. So you had me tongue
the bodies of rich women until my mouth grew numb.
My womb, my inability to find pleasure in the sexual act
was your private eel experiment. You said,
in dying early, my father had stripped me of male genitals—
hence my being a woman. So when the Inheritrix of Stanford
left me the family jewels in exchange for services,
I thought it odd that you showed extreme
interest in possessing them. Perhaps there was a reason
you refused to talk about your own childhood
or gave injections that heightened
your patients’ awareness of rape. Please be advised
that when I broke your jaw against the safe,
it was only to spare you the pain of castration.
I couldn’t leave without retrieving part of the manhood
you swindled from me. I have found my peace
in the Antipodes and pray that you find
yours as you sip your supper through a straw.
You have used people badly long enough.
Published in blossombones, summer 2010