some Jack Marx Snark
Feb. 13th, 2007 08:20 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
highlyeccentricwhat the gossip mags don't tell you
i'm not quite sure what this one is mocking, but here's a sample:
Who didn't cry yesterday upon hearing the news that Angelina Jolie's mother had died? Sure, we didn't know Marcheline Bertrand personally. Sure, we wouldn't have been able to pick her out of a police line-up. Sure, I'm ... not really sure of what this third fact we're meant to be "sure" of is supposed to be - I just know that columnists are supposed to have at least three things they and the readers are together "sure" about. Granted, I'm not really a columnist any more than I am in a position to be handing out grants to my readership. But I digress. I also masturbate occasionally, but there's no need for me to tell you about that quite so much as there is a need for digressing columnists to inform readers of their digressions when they occur, lest the readers think they've busted the columnist for something of which he is not already aware. Look, you're not looking and I want you to look at something, in this instance over the page.
i'm not quite sure what this one is mocking, but here's a sample:
Who didn't cry yesterday upon hearing the news that Angelina Jolie's mother had died? Sure, we didn't know Marcheline Bertrand personally. Sure, we wouldn't have been able to pick her out of a police line-up. Sure, I'm ... not really sure of what this third fact we're meant to be "sure" of is supposed to be - I just know that columnists are supposed to have at least three things they and the readers are together "sure" about. Granted, I'm not really a columnist any more than I am in a position to be handing out grants to my readership. But I digress. I also masturbate occasionally, but there's no need for me to tell you about that quite so much as there is a need for digressing columnists to inform readers of their digressions when they occur, lest the readers think they've busted the columnist for something of which he is not already aware. Look, you're not looking and I want you to look at something, in this instance over the page.