weirdest customer, ever. EVER. in the history of customers.
He's in late middle age; hasn't got much hair. Has dyed his scalp to compensate. Is wearing big wraparound black sunnies, and has very dark olive skin, creating an overall impression of a member of the Mafia gone to seed. Walks purposefully into the store, heads right for the information counter, then stands around. Not looking lost, just standing.
Me: can i help you sir?
Weirdo: i'd like a million dollars and Renee Zelwiger.
Me: what was that, sir?
Weirdo: a million dollars and Renee Zelwiger. I'd settle for just Renee Zelwiger.
Me: *confused look*
Weirdo: she's in the movies.
Me: Oh, Renee Zelwiger. ahaha. I don't think we stock her.
Weirdo: you're pretty enough, but you don't cut it.
Me: *confused look*
Weirdo: You're no Renee Zelwiger. Shoulda become a nun.
Me: well, it's not too late now, i suppose.
Weirdo: you'll be the prettiest nun in there!
Me: *brain shuts down*
Weirdo then turns and purposefully walks into the bookstore, turns left and marches in the direction of their exit. Or possibly in the direction of the nearest blonde salesgirl, which just co-incided with the same direction as the exit.
My customers are weirder than your customers, Random David.
He's in late middle age; hasn't got much hair. Has dyed his scalp to compensate. Is wearing big wraparound black sunnies, and has very dark olive skin, creating an overall impression of a member of the Mafia gone to seed. Walks purposefully into the store, heads right for the information counter, then stands around. Not looking lost, just standing.
Me: can i help you sir?
Weirdo: i'd like a million dollars and Renee Zelwiger.
Me: what was that, sir?
Weirdo: a million dollars and Renee Zelwiger. I'd settle for just Renee Zelwiger.
Me: *confused look*
Weirdo: she's in the movies.
Me: Oh, Renee Zelwiger. ahaha. I don't think we stock her.
Weirdo: you're pretty enough, but you don't cut it.
Me: *confused look*
Weirdo: You're no Renee Zelwiger. Shoulda become a nun.
Me: well, it's not too late now, i suppose.
Weirdo: you'll be the prettiest nun in there!
Me: *brain shuts down*
Weirdo then turns and purposefully walks into the bookstore, turns left and marches in the direction of their exit. Or possibly in the direction of the nearest blonde salesgirl, which just co-incided with the same direction as the exit.
My customers are weirder than your customers, Random David.