TRUST ME: I'M DEPRESSED! Or, more words on looking after one's cranky inner child

[highlyeccentric]

The question isn't whether or not you like yourself: it's whether or not you're nice to yourself.

ANALOGY. Self-care is like looking after a four-year old: they need care and stability all the time. But the times when they need extra attention and affection and sometimes interventions to get them to calm the fuck down are the times when actually, they're driving you up the wall, and even if you like them you're not feeling very kindly toward them right now.

Thing is, though: whether or not they have a good reason to be upset, and whether or not you feel kindly toward them, are irrelevant. Fact is, they will be happier and your life will be easier if you give them cuddles/soothing activities/a bath/an early bedtime.

THIS IS ALSO TRUE OF ADULT EMOTIONS.

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This analogy is brought to you in honour of a certain friend of mine, who responded to my suggestion that he be extra-nice to himself when feeling sad with "it's not that I don't LIKE myself! It's just that [reiterates sadnesses of the day]"

Comments

[monksandbones]

This is a good analogy! Must ponder its application...

[highlyeccentric]

An alternative version, for those who like to think of their emotional selves as functional adults, would be to imagine living with and showing love for a partner or family member - the times they need the compassion and gentle treatment are the times when they're most likely to be a bloody nuisance, right?

[peroxidepirate]

Oh yes, that absolutely has the ring of truth. I love your mind.